Children will react in different ways to being brought up in a home with a violent person. Age, race, sex, culture, stage of development, and individual personality will all have an effect on a child's responses. Most children, however, will be affected in some way by tension or by witnessing arguments, distressing behaviour or assaults - even if they do not always show this. They may feel that they are to blame, or - like you - they may feel angry, guilty, insecure, alone, frightened, powerless, or confused. They may have ambivalent feelings, both towards the abuser, and towards the non-abusing parent.
These are some of the effects of domestic violence on children:
- They may become anxious or depressed.
- They may have difficulty sleeping.
- They may have nightmares or flashbacks.
- They may complain of physical symptoms such as tummy aches.
- They may start to wet their bed.
- They may have temper tantrums.
- They may behave as though they are much younger than they are.
- They may have problems at school, or may start truanting.
- They may become aggressive.
- They may internalise their distress and withdraw from other people.
- They may have a lowered sense of self-worth.
- Older children may start to use alcohol or drugs.
- They may begin to self-harm by taking overdoses or cutting themselves.
- They may develop an eating disorder.